Never Ending Interruptions
Question:
When I'm talking with my husband, or have friends over the house,
my 3 year-old just has to interrupt me. She thinks
everything is an emergency and won't stop jumping in saying,
"Mommy, Mommy." I can never have an adult
conversation in peace. What can I do to stop her from
interrupting. I can't wait to hear your advice. Kathy
R.
Answer:
Kids just can't seem to wait
It's tough for little ones to wait, even for 10 seconds, because
they think that everything they say is Ultra Important.
Stopping your child from interrupting will be a multi-step
process. It will take some effort on your part, but
eventually you'll be able to have a interruption-free
conversation.
Discuss Feelings
Talk with your child about how you feel when you're
interrupted. Ask her how she feels if someone interrupts her
when she's talking. You can role play to make this
point. Sit at a table with your child and husband. Ask
your child to tell your husband about something fun she did that
day. Interrupt her, after a few minutes, to ask your husband
an unimportant question. Make sure the question is similar
to ones that she asks when she interrupts. Ask her how she
felt when she was interrupted. Ask her if she felt that your
comment was important enough to stop her from telling her
story. Discuss the importance of not interrupting.
Set Boundaries
Tell your child that if she has something to say that she feels is
very important, she can come to you and say, "excuse
me", and you'll put your hand on her shoulder to let her know
you heard her. Let her know that once you put your hand on
her shoulder, she needs to wait until you tell her it's ok to
talk. Only wait a few seconds before allowing her to
speak. Then thank her for waiting.
Limit Interruptions
Once your daughter learns to say "excuse me" and
wait patiently for a few seconds, extend the number of seconds you
make her wait. Then decide a maximum amount of interruptions
that she will be permitted. Once she has interrupted your
conversation, the permitted number of times, let her know that
she's had her final interruption and she's now to go play until
you're finished talking. If your child comes back into the
room and seems eager to tell you something, but restrains from
interrupting, you can take a break to ask her what she's up to and
let her tell you her comment and then thank her for not
interrupting.
No more interruptions
As your child begins to learn the techniques of waiting patiently
and understanding what type of comments are important enough to
warrant an interruption, you'll notice fewer interruptions
happening. Your child might never stop interrupting all
together, but by using these techniques and training your child
about the proper ways and times to interrupt, you'll most likely
have more enjoyable, uninterrupted conversations in the future.
Kim Proulx is the creator of The Happy
Discipline Kit. A positive discipline program and tool
that can change your life as a parent. Kim is also
available to do free, one-hour Happy Discipline Workshops for
parents of preschoolers at your preschool or organization and she
is also available to meet with parents to do one-on-one parenting
consultations. If you'd like to learn more click
here.
